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Local Calls

The Queen,George Bush & Chandrika all died & went to hell.
They were sitting & chatting together when the Queen wondered how her subjects were & requested the Devil for a call to England. After a lot of persuasion she got the call & spoke for about 5 minutes ...

Queen : How much for the call ?
Devil : 1 million pounds
Queen : A million pounds ??? however she had no choice but to pay. She paid & went back to her seat.

George Bush not wanting to be kept out of things requested a call too. he was given the call, spoke for about 3 minutes & was charged 2 Million dollars.

Chandrika seeing all this got extremely jealous. She made a hugh racket & started shouting I too need a call. I need to speak to my prime miniter The Army commander need to know how the war is going ... etc. The devil was so irritated he gave her the call to Sri lanka. She spoke & spoke & spoke she went on for about 10 hours. Finally she asked..

Chandrika : how much for the call
Devil : 10 Rupees only
Chandrika : What only 10 Rupees ????
Devil : Well, from Hell to Hell, it's a local Call.


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Passing the Exam

Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist. If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for five years.

The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board looking over an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump.

The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms.

Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs.

The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump. "Congratulations! You're a free man. Just tell me why didn't you jump?" asked the doctor.

To which the third patient answered, "Well Doc, I can't swim!"

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